Menopausal Poetry Series

Because I love poetry, and there are so few poems about menopause out there, I have dug deep into my computer files and pulled out a series from over ten years ago when I was in the throes of it.

Here's one:

Three little pills and a Pomegranate

Muse on the table

are you food or drink?

Three little pills on my yellow placemat:

One clever red clover

renders me immune to restlessness,

cures insomnia.

Vitamin B mitigates “the change”,

Calcium Citrate coats the nerves,

protects the children from swinging

moods, banged doors.

Biting into a shiny red orb allowed

Persephone to see her mother half the year.

My prying fingers reveal a messy beehive

of oblong kernels.

Mouth puckers as crystal blobs,

nutty & tart, stain my fingers rouge.

Will it make me mortal to eat these seeds?

Already I have become human

in my daughter’s eyes.

I told Katie that her cat died.

Rocking in darkness

comforted us both.

Bindi miracle party

Not the best photo of me, but we were seriously focused on applying a red dot to each other's foreheads, at our women's retreat supper, which evolved into a bindi miracle party.

Wikipidea had this to say about bindi dots:

The area between the eyebrows (where the bindi is placed) is said to be the sixth chakra, ajna, the seat of "concealed wisdom". According to followers of Hinduism, this chakra is the exit point for kundalini energy. The bindi is said to retain energy and strengthen concentration.[4] It is also said to protect against demons or bad luck.
In modern times, bindis are worn by women of many religious dispositions in South Asia and Southeast Asia, including Muslim and Christian women, and is not restricted to Hindus.

So why a red dot? it no longer signifies a married woman, but it might have a source in the red blood at menstruation. The colour red is sacred because it is the colour of blood and symbolizes life in many cultures. The moon mother's blood is called wise blood, especially when it is withheld by menopausal women, making them Wise Women.

The third eye is a place of insight, where the ultimate vision of the Absolute can be seen with the inner eye. (The Woman's Dictionary of symbols and sacred objects) So wisdom above and below is connected with the red dot or bindi, a powerful symbol of womanhood.

The night of our bindi miracle party, we were telling our first menstruation stories, how it was for us. Sometimes it lead to lots of laughter, some of the stories were more sombre and tearful.

It was not something any of our mothers would have taught us to celebrate. So we decided to celebrate it ourselves, informally, in this little ritual.

While we did, we talked about our daughters, and how they may want or not want to be gifted with a symbol of insight, or jewellery more likely, along with a basket of pads, tampons or paraphanelia of 'woman's stuff'. Listen to our voices get hushed when we talk about 'women's stuff'. Why is the taboo so strong, still?

Just found this info on another site about bindi symbolism:
http://archives.chennaionline.com/style/Beautytrends/beautytips/bindi.asp

Some scholars see the red colour as a symbolism for blood. We are told that in ancient times, in Aryan society, a groom used to apply his blood on-his bride's forehead as a recognition of wedlock. The existing practice among Indian women of applying a round shaped red Tilaka called Bindiya or Kumkum could be a survival of this idea.

Do you think it more likely it's men's blood or women's blood originally?

enjoy the day,
jenn/musemother

Woman Cycles

A woman cycles constantly. If you are in touch with your cycle, you meet its ups and downs instead of struggling to control, contain, remove, deny, fight it.

What does it take to get to know your cycle? a willingness to know, a moment or two in your day to chart where you are, a curiousity about your body, your emotions.

It also helps to get aware of the moon in the sky - is it half moon, in decline, on the wane, or nearing fullness? is it a new moon, or the dark of the moon? and how does that make you feel?

If you are on the pill, chances are you have a cycle but it's covered over with the artificial hormones you are taking. Some women notice their moods and patterns change when they go off the pill. The following is an excerpt from the book, The Pill, are you sure it's for you? by Jane Bennett and Alexandra Pope. (see sidebar for link to Wild Genie website)

"Are cycles inherently important? ...appreciating the inherent logic and power of cycles for sustaining life - your body's and the planet's - might help you to get clearer on whether the Pill is really a good thing for you." (think tides, seasons, circling planets, flow....)

"A cycle is a system of generation and regeneration - of birth, growth, peaking, falling away and ending to be followed again by birth. It's a process of expansion and contraction, of activity and rest. ...your body is in constant rhythmic change, much of which is happening beneath your awareness. ...It's your changing nature that's keeping you alive, lively, responsive and creative."

Some women on the Pill suffer through bad moods, hysterical crying bouts, anxiety and depression. One woman quoted in the book, came off the Pill after taking it for 2 years. "'The pill is a pattern but it's not your pattern.' Her extreme moods cleared up and learning about her body through fertility awareness made her realise how much more in tune with her life she can be. At certain times of the month she knows she can expect certain things - when she's fertile and infertile and when her period is due - and knowing this puts other aspects of her life in context as well. For instance, knowing that she's fertile helps her understand why she feels so sexy and horny, joyuous when she sees a newborn baby and generally in a good mood. knowing that her period is due helps her accept her feelings of ill ease with her body and a general edginess and anxiety. Connecting to the rhythm of her body has been really empowering."

As cyclical beings, we have times of high energy and productiveness, and we also have down times of rest and retreat. Sometimes to find our creative energy we need quiet reflective times. Stress and busyness are stimulating, but too much of a good thing wears us down. In each day even, we have cycles of on and off, high energy and low energy. If we don't listen to the subtle signals from the body, for when we are needing a break or needing nourishment, we get cranky, anxious, we rush too fast and make mistakes and get into accidents. Try going with the flow of your cycles, and cooperate with your body's ebb and flow, as Alexander Pope puts it in this marvelous book.

You are made of flesh and blood, circling in your body, pumping in and out of your heart. Get into the rhythm of life. Be in synch with your self. Get vital energy from good food, from exercise, from rest. And listen to your woman's cycles for a deeper sense of groundedness.

You are worth knowing about! Learn more about this finely tuned instrument.
I highly recommend this book, for any woman on the Pill or considering going on it. There are upsides and downsides, and definitely you will learn more about the woman's body and cycles in this book, as well as alternative methods of contraception.

nameste,
musemother

Harnessing the Power of Menstrual Blood

The Globe & Mail in Canada ran a story on the uses of menstrual blood for stem cell research. Click on link below:

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20080819.wstem19/BNStory/specialScienceandHealth/home

August 19, 2008 at 4:12 AM EDT
A team of researchers from Canada and the United States has taken an important step toward harnessing the healing power of menstrual blood. ...

Wouldn't it be wonderful if scientific research could demonstrate what native americans have known for a very long time, that menstrual blood is full of generative properties, life-giving and life-enhancing. Mixed with water and poured on plants, it apparently feeds their growth.

Instead of being seen through the eyes of superstition and fear as a polluting element, we can begin to study the 'blessings of the curse', as Susan Rako sub-titles her book, No More Periods.

"As yeast is good for dough, so is menstruation good for women." says a Talmudic scholar.

"Menstrual blood is the only source of blood that is not traumatically induced. Yet in modern society, this is the most hidden blood, the one so rarely spoken of and almost never seen, except privately by women, who shut themselves in a little room to quickly and in many cases disgustedly change their pads and tampons, wrapping the bloodied cotton so it won't be seen by others, wrinkling their faces at the odor, flushing or hiding the evidence away. Blood is everywhere, and yet the one, the only, the single name it has not publicly had, for many centuries, is menstrual blood. " Blood, Bread & Roses, How Menstruation created the world, Judy Grahn.

"Several Native American cultures consider women in menses to be at the HEIGHT of her powers. For instance, the Lakota tribe would not permit a menstrual woman anywhere near warriors or healers. They believed that menstrual blood was so powerful that just the presence of such power would weaken the strength of warriors and interfere with a healer's ability to heal. The menstrual blood serves to purify, to cleanse, renew, and it prepares the woman for higher spiritual accomplishments. The Yurok, and Lakota tribes practiced monthly rituals by retreating into MOON lodges with other menstrual women. There they celebrated the power of their menstrual blood.

SO, at the height of my power, through the ebb and flow of life, giving and life-sustaining blood that flows through me, I isolate myself from the mundane petty distractions and instead focus inward. Thus CALLING VISION for MY PEOPLE. Simple. Get it? Indeed I do feel more creative, more artistic, more insightful, and with each monthly cycle I become more in tune with my connection to nature, thus accumulating a greater store of spiritual energy. ERGO, when I menstruate, I don't see it as negative darkness or as a curse. Instead I prefer to view the process in a more positive, healthy attitude: it is a natural, sacred connection to the cycles and rhythms of the earth.

Menstrual blood is LIFE GIVING and LIFE SUSTAINING. There are also native tribes that would return the sacred life-giving blood back to the earth. They would sit over seeds and let the sacred blood flow directly on the seeds or on newly planted seedlings, which INDEED DOES give the seeds growing power. I add here to any who are asking, What? That is sick! NO, NOT sick at all. For an experiment I suggest using INSTEAD menstrual cups to collect the powerful blood into a jar. Fill the remainder of the jar with water then use the solution to water your plants. Be sure to use plain water on other plants for comparing the difference. IT IS AMAZING how powerful menstrual blood is. Of course it is NOT a good idea to disclose this to most people because our current culture has deemed MENSTRUAL BLOOD as disgusting and gross. BELIEVE ME, MY PLANTS are so healthy it is amazing. (taken from www.mum.org)

nameste,
musemother

Back from New York, Books I've been reading

While in New York with my daughter, and without access to Internet, I actually lived day to day without blogging, without emails, without surfing the net. But thankfully, I had several new books with me, one The Cleft by Doris Lessing, an amusing and fictional account of the origins of a people who at first birthed only girls, and who gradually get used to seeing male children be born....treating them as misshapen monsters at first and killing them. She imagines a highly segregated society, with the men living over the other side of the mountain, brought up on deer's milk and learning to hunt, while the women live near the sea and swim and fish all day.

Another historical perspective was gleaned from Marilyn French's overview of women in From Eve to Dawn....a history of how women are treated, what status and privileges they enjoy (or mostly not) from prehistoric matrilineal clans to the creation of the major monotheistic religions: Judaism, Christianity and Islam. Fascinating and crammed with bizarre facts and treatment of women as virtual slaves without rights, this book is a must read for anyone wondering why it took so long for women to rise up and demand equality.

The sad thing is, our myths and metaphors, our spiritual narratives and origin stories do define us. They delineate what is 'normal', permissible and usual. My strongest reaction in reading these two books is how strong 'story' is for the human mind. In order to believe something is real, we need to have a story to lay it out for us, a beginning story. The original mother myths where women are honoured for their birthgiving and lifegiving powers are mostly buried under the father myths of origin. Who was Eve's mother, I wonder, knowing that Eve is a construct, a myth created to aid the subjugation of women. How undo the 'curse' laid on her, and bestow honour and beauty on the feminine mysteries once more?

All through the Marilyn French book, there are references to women mystics and our propensity for intuitive types of knowing. Another powerful book, Blood Bread & Roses, which I also had with me, posits that women's menstrual cycle is the basis for all ritual and religion, and even culture. It is a fascinating and plausible re-creation of the early prehistoric mind, searching for meaning and connection to the world outside it, but without the power of language to create meaning.

Women secluded themselves during their bleeding times for very practical reasons : wild beasts are attracted to the scent of blood and it is a life-threatening occurrence to be outdoors leaving a trail of blood behind one. Much safer to stay in the cave, but this creates a messy environment to share with children and men, so women created little seats or chairs to raise themselves off the ground and collect the blood, or they removed themselves completely into tents or huts made especially as shelters for bleeding women.

Women also tended to bleed together: this is known as entrainement. You've probably noticed if you live with other women that your cycles start to be in synch with each other. Women had more exposure to the moon, and no artificial light for thousands of years. So the link between their monthly 28 day cycle and the moon's was easily recognized and venerated. The first 'holy' sacred deities were moon goddesses. Women created elaborate rituals to protect their connecton or 'power' at this time and segegrated themselves in what became a kind of secret society of women (which in later centuries became threatening to men and considered witchcraft).

Women in native american cultures were often seen as having greater powers of Dreaming or having visions for their people during their menstrual time. And at least one modern author, Alexandra Pope, encourages women to use this enhanced sensitivity and cultivate solitude or stillness to create a sacred time for themselves, paying especial attention to their dreams and intuition. It appears that women do have special healing powers, when they allow their rational minds to slow down and allow the unconscious forces to guide them.

Of course, our rational scientific world and its emphasis on external proof of truth denies that there is power coming from within, or knowledge internally based without 'proof'. But most women who allow themselves to get in touch with it can vouch for its authenticity. In peri-menopause, many of us begin to weary of the solely outward focus of modern life and either experience nervous breakdown or simply a strong desire to be alone, to quit unsatisfying jobs or change careers, to allow this creative, healing power to manifest.

Have you felt the call? do you recognize that your menstrual cycle may be the barometer of your wisdom, your inner knowing? there are many good books now by women researchers and historians. This blog is my attempt at synthesizing this 'new' but ancient information.

happy reading,
musemother