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Friday, January 04, 2008

New year's update

We have never been buried in so much snow! Even in what to some of you looks like the 'far North', and to some others looks like the 'south', we have been having skimpy winters past 10 years. I have never seen my back yard this overflowing with snow, the hedge with a huge white beard and icicles.

My holidays went by too fast. Started with a musicians bash - old and young - jamming the night away and a potluck feast. Thanks Sylvie and Andre. Then a fancy Christmas Eve supper in the Laurentians with friends and kids. Christmas Day supper with family (in-laws). Next day left on the all night train to Bonaventure with the whole group of out-laws including nieces nephews and their prospective girl/boyfriends (23 of us in all). Sleeping Car full of our joyful boisterous noise, some really good scotch and a few bottles of Pinot Noir smuggled aboard. 3 days later, we staggered back on the train in Bonaventure (Gaspe) for another all night train ride, this one a bit more subdued after feasting and music and late night in-house bistro parties.

Sigh, it is a lovely family, my husband has brought me into. And the musician and singer in me loves to stay up late and sing all night.

But I hit the wall or the Waterloo of holiday low spirits in Ottawa, after we spent 2 days with my family.... can't keep up with it like my younger self could. (But then my younger self was very young - from age 19-28 I was a tee-totalling vegeterian, mostly celibate).

Anyhoo, I'm back to my books, (received the whole list of books I circled in the Book Section of the G&M my gawd) and today, luxuriously spent two hours with A Woman's Quest and Blood Bread & Roses.

You'll be hearing more about these two books on my menopause blog or wisdom for women. Cause it is the most heartening discovery of all, to know that we can actually prepare for menopause. We can use the allies of stillness, softness, serenity and surrender to get closer to our own reality.

I always wondered what intuition was, and most of the time I think I have a knack for it. But sadly, most of the time I am moving too fast to pay attention, pushing myself forward, belting my own back with push strive get going don't rest keep moving kind of messages. Ignoring the sad little voice that says, wait a minute, what about my rhythm, my pacing, my needs? You know that the hardest thing for a woman to do is go pee when she has to? there is always something else to finish first. Multi-tasking is dangerous in menopause, there are bones to break, muscles to twist, but I insist on multitudinous activities - can't cross the kitchen without one more thing in my hand to put away, in spite of sore shoulders I still carry in two heavy bags from the car, instead of making 2 trips.

So, slowing down is a challenge. But when you know the rewards - it's so gratifying, to find your hunches are right, and you stay put and things come to you when you need them. The phone rings, your appointment has been cancelled (that was one too many things in your day) or the delivery has been rescheduled till Monday (yes! I can stay in and finish reading that article).

being a stay-at-home mom and part-time teacher of workshops, it's easy for me to put it off til tomorrow, that 'reading' I do for my own learning, to prepare a future class, that doesn't have a due date, or the lecture for September that seems so far away.

But today, now, this afternoon, I am going to give myself another hour and sit in the comfy chair. The birds have been fed, I dug a snow path to the feeder, I walked the dog, I did the groceries, I fixed the phone, I made lunch for the kids....and now, back to the books.

warm fuzzies,
jenn

1 comment:

Chloe said...

I laughed out load about the peeing thing. So true!

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