Monday, September 08, 2008

Life's Quest

There are two quests in my life. The questing girl seeks a connection she already has but has not been aware of - the deep knowledge of the feminine way, a woman's way in the world. A way of knowing and being that is not based on outer knowing only, or facts and logic, but is whispered to her just before she acts, take this road, choose this way. Without knowing company is coming, she sweeps the kitchen floor and changes into finer clothes, and within 10 minutes the phone rings, mother-in-law with guests on the way over in half-an-hour. S

Sometimes she knows who is calling before the phone stops ringing.

She doesn't always listen.

The other quest is on the inside too, but has no real name. It's not a labyrinthine journey, it's a thirst. The heart that is human, partly divine, partly mortal, seeks it's other half - it's Beloved or best Friend. The one who knows, the one who doesn't speak in theory, but who knows the joy of living. For no reason, for no external purpose. Fulfillment, you could call it. Just receiving with open arms, accepting the gift of life and knowing a deeper purpose - gratitude, kindness, peace.

Could it be that the quester has the answer inside her all the time? like the story of the musk deer who seeks the source of the musk, thinking it is in another musk deer....

Recently I heard this:

Think of life like this: It is your opportunity to spend time with the best friend you ever had. It is your time. This chance to be with the ultimate clarity that there is in this whole universe. It is your chance to spend time with the ultimate kindness. It is your chance to spend time with the infinite. It is your chance to spend some time with the ultimate joy.

What a turn around from my conditioning of life as struggle, life as 'comme ci comme ca', life as teacher that you can't always get what you want.

A chance to spend time with the ultimate joy?


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