SoulCollage(R) card: Ready to Blow!
Sometimes the G-force of mid-life changes flattens you back up against your seat like on a Roller coaster. You lose a friend to breast cancer, a parent dies, your children turn into strangers in their teens, and you begin to feel as fragile as a one-winged butterfly blown in the wind. You, who were the strong one, the stable influence, the core and heartbeat of the family, the one who held it all together, begin to feel like you are falling part.
As I wrote in my book The Tao of Turning Fifty, the greatest lessons I learned (and am still learning at age 64), are these:
- you cannot do it all alone - ask for help and release the Superwoman Syndrome
- you are allowed to rest, take naps, take a break to breathe, Pause often and do Nothing
- surrender, stop fighting the current
- stillness and solitude are great allies - book some time to Get Away!
- girlfriends who can listen to your rants and angst are a great Boost, cherish them
- tell your husband and your family that this temporary insanity will end and to be extra patient with you, as you swing high and low. Get them to help out and expect them to pitch in!
I know for me, my shoulders were carrying the burden of taking care of everyone and doing it all myself. As the eldest in a family of eight, I had been brought up to be the One in Charge, responsible and dutiful. It was very hard for me to soften the reins, loosen my grip, and ask for help when I needed it. Sore aching shoulders, (calcific bursitis) lead me to get some TLC and extra massages, which was a real boon. I was so used to Soldiering On, despite the pain, but I was forced to give in and get help.
That is why I am writing this message for you, mid-life women, today. You don't have to do it all alone. Grant yourself a prescription for loving kindness, small little ways to reduce the load and love yourself at the same time.
ps see my website for information on the upcoming one-day workshop Body Love In a Dangerous Time, with SoulCollage(R), and journaling exercises to help you love your body and soul!
SoulCollage(R) card: Angel Blesses my Belly
My Body is not a Danger zone